Search This Blog

Friday, June 12, 2009

Male & Female are Complementary

What does it mean to be a man? What does it mean to be a woman? We have assumed, presumed, guessed and confused ourselves as we search for the true meaning. Have we lost our way? How do we navigate through the confusion, media pressure and our past, to find the truth? Who will show the way? [ very interesting questions hor]

I went to this talked called Return Of The King. Thanks to Celest and Lukas for my tickets (I saw the write up and was interested didn't know need to buy tickets, lucky for those two people I got a ticket)

What is man and womanhood? The biggest issue now in our society is the gender question.

What makes a man, a man and a woman, a woman? Good question hor?
It all actually starts from being a person. Which is called Person-hood. Now this is what I have experienced and did talk about it to some people I've known. When you're in a relationship at a young age, you don't have time to actually develop your person-hood. That is why most of the relationships don't last called puppy love. I read in Dr. James Dobson books, the age between secondary school to college/university life is the most important years. That is where you set your values, make most out of your mistakes and if possible meet the right company/friends which also determines a big part of your future. Being stable in character, values and finding true self actually is time you are spent alone.

Person-hood - Who you are regardless of gender and views of public.
So actually who are we? How do people actually look at us or how do we look at people? What is right? Person-hood is actually values of an innate person. It is not so about equal rights, but equal values. Ps. Dr Lew Lee Choo and Ps Dr Chew Weng Chee stated that when you forgive it is not about right or wrong. It is to validate the person in the image of God. That is really a great thought. What she meant was we are supposed to view people in the image of God, VALIDATION.

Validation = Person-hood in God's eyes.

We all want to be validated as a person don't we? Most of the time we want to be fulfilled. We can be fulfilled only when people agree that we are a person with great values. I admit myself that it is so true. I want people to see me as a man of principle. Lets just say if a building is RM x Billion, it is a fact. So you can either believe it, don't believe, be skeptical about it or don't care about it BUT no matter what it is remains the same.

What Ps. Dr Lew Lee Choo said which I want to share is that Both M/F have similar tasks. A man feels down when he doesn't get his SIGNIFICANCE and a woman feels down when she doesn't feel her WORTH. She depictions the violin and a guitar. Can a guitar be used in a orchestra? Sure definitely. Can a violin be played in a band? Sure definitely but can a violin play like the role as a guitar and vice versa? Nope. They each play their own role and that is what M/F is about.

What is important to MAN? It boils down to three main categories which are Identity, Responsibility and Blame. Being able to hold up responsibility is the mark of a grown-up. We all have responsibilities and we all know it isn't easy sometimes. Time to time when we don't/can't take up our responsibilities we become the blame people person.

The question I like to ask is this, WHAT DEFINES YOUR WORTH LADIES? & WHAT DEFINES YOUR SIGNIFICANCE GENTLEMAN?

So there you go again, the opposite sex compliments each other ^^
The thing about guys that a lot girls don't know is we are wired to have egos. It's a true fact, just how big it is. The worst punishment for a guy is to humiliate them in public. In fact, Ps. Dr Chew said guys are wired to be leaders. What I am trying to share is not in the sense that ladies can't be leaders too. It is just that we are not just designed for leadership, we are also destined for leadership (Visible). Woman are normally happy to let men lead if the men would rise up? Is it true? We actually perform at best when we play functions as the leader. Winning actually generates momentum and morale for Men (Victorious). The man must be the vision of the family or is the Vision of the relationship (where it is going, how far, where to aim)

So ideally a Man should be Visionary, Visible and Victorious.

As for Ladies/Woman, must learn to embrace womanhood.
For the ladies, Ps. Dr Lew Lee Choo said that it is important to Value Your Looks. When you ladies look good you actually add value to what God made you for. Woman need to value their looks in God's view and not peoples view or rather a beautician's view.

She also said that normally people who try to over show/dress to kill (can see too much skin) or don't dress/act like a girl, shows how not comfortable you are with your looks. So she said God made you that way, so you should learn to value your looks and admire your beauty. The funny thing she said was "When you become a wife don't let go of your looks". She said this explaining that a woman's looks actually complements a guy (so true). Not overdress or overkill la in that sense. Example if you dress in a way the generates lust from all the guys in the room it is just not decent la! Who wants to have someone who is the object of everyone's eyes. Imagine that girl/lady is your wife or your sister or your mom, you will feel offended rite?

The gift of females is pure Compassion. They actually feel far more than man and is always looking for a person who can commit. It is their duty to embrace the call to build. "Finance, marriage and emotional strength of the family is based on the female of the family" Says Ps. Choo. She meant that if the woman is not willing to commit to those or gives up, everything falls.

So woman are good builders -> as they should Value their looks, do have great Compassion built in them and must appeal to the Call to Build (building value back to a man also)

In the bible, it actually states that God created woman as help-made or help-mate. So how can we actually help each other to be a Better man or woman?

Bottom-line
-No Hidden Agenda
-No Manipulation
-No Deception
-No Domination

-So we should build a community, challenge each other to grow and create a cycle of giving and receiving love and kindness =)

Ps: some interesting photos below haha

Was twittering about Run For The Nation. This is a awesome video about it.

No comments: